Sometimes I feel furious about delay and want to grab my brushes and start to paint whatever it will be. I want it right now. It is good for new unknown things, for investigations, such a free fly through possibilities. However some projects need to be well prepared in order to make optimisation and clear understanding rather then just an impulse.

I force myself to make several conspects step-by-step descriptions about film directinf. I can`t clear explain why I need it. Because obviously I am not Holliwood and can`t make somethink like Avatar although my imagination force me for it.

Why I don`t start just to do a film with all matherials I already have? Why I don`t try to make something simple and sufficient?

May be because I want to be sure what more I can do. Not something from yesterday but from tomorrow.

I would like to investigate new things in one or more leel above my today possibilities. That`s why I am still on planing of my films, still polishing projects, learnig more, changing concepts.

Sometimes it needs more tricky ideas to overcome natural limitations, such as I have no movie about many previous paintings, only photos. As I don`t want the film boring, it should be think and rethink about possibilities. So I make many preparations trying to catch a liece of general idea here and there.

It seems, in usual things people know professionally this is no needs in long preparations. Having an impulse to create something I need just my tools, not more. Hoever in more lage, long term projects information comes by pieces so long preparation allows it to make better clusters in the brain neuronetwork.

That thoughts made me more tolerant with the delay so I have to analise how films are directed step by step.